What's tomorrow?

I get myself thinking about things I will never get.
I plan and dream about things I will never touch.
I am emotionally broken.
I thought I was able to handle with weight of the world
That I held deep inside.
I am unconditionally destroyed.

I figured maybe I could really have a relationship
Like a silly love story which there is always a prince to save your life
There are no princes. There are no princesses.
In the real life, love is not only what you are but what you look like.
In real life you can even be "intelligent, beautiful and strong" but you will never be able to be loved
if you were born outside the box of what the "normal" is.

I am emotionally ground.
But I still think about the future.
I think about what tomorrow is.
I feel afraid.
I feel alone.
I still didn't learn how to deal with solitude.

In my mind I paint solitude pictures of myself
I feel like I am in a very far planet all by myself
walking miles and miles away looking for someone, but there's no one.
I am alone in this dry lonely world.
I feel like my prison is the desert of solitude.
No love. No kind. No smiles...

Smiles are all fake.
I am just a sperm deposit.
No. I'm not good to that either...

I keep walking by myself.
As I have been doing since I was born.
A solitude childhood.
A solitude adolescence.
A solide adulthood.
Maybe that's my destiny: to find out a way to deal with myself.
Meanwhile my inner voice keep asking
What is tomorrow?